Romans 8:28 KJV 28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
This has been my go to verse for many months now...months of waiting, months of praying, months of doubt, and discouragement. Ultimately knowing deep down in my heart that God was preparing a position for me in which to place me in order to fulfill my calling as a nurse.
I have always felt as if I was a helper, and at times this "personality" has gotten me into situations that without the Lord's help I wouldn't have gotten out of. As a young girl in Sunday school, one Sunday a month the youth would go to the nursing homes in the county and visit with the elderly. Seeing these people in the nursing homes instilled in me a passion to help others. Even then, I knew that one day I would be working with people, helping them, caring for them, showing them compassion. In high school I began to take allied health in which I obtained my CNA license. I had a full scholarship and the referrals to go to nursing school as soon as I graduated. However, then I wasn't living the way God intended me to and I certainly wasn't listening to his calling and I gave up that chance and ran. I ran towards a man who promised me the world with no intention of filling his promises. I chose a bad road, a very bad road in which I was lied to, cheated on, and abused in every form and fashion, a very dangerous road. During this time I began to work as a nurses aide in a nursing home. I loved my job! Taking care of people, helping them do the daily tasks that i took for granted, helping them eat, and bathe, and dress. Each and every day someone touched me and witnessed to me. Many of my colleagues urged me to further my career and I continued to feel that "calling" from God. I regretted giving up my "full ride" to nursing school and doubted God's ability to help me through it on my own. Only by God's grace and his unending mercy did he deliver me from that abusive situation. Afterwards, despite the fact that God had delivered me, I was at a VERY low point in my life. I felt as if I would never amount to anything, that I wasn't good enough for anyone or anything and I despised myself for falling for a man's lies. Like I said before I was running from everything good for me and turning to the world to fulfill the void in my soul instead of running back to God. A few years passed and as I continued to care for people in the nursing homes, God once again reminded me I needed to further my career. It took a while for me to "catch up" as I continued to run, pretending I didn't hear God, trying to make myself "comfortable" with NOT furthering my career. It took me several years later, a divorce and more abuse to FINALLY begin pursuing a career as a registered nurse. I took classes, worked, tried to raise 3 kids, relied on my family more than I should have, and passed my first year of nursing school. I had began yet another relationship with a man who yet again promised me everything under the sun and I fell for it. The summer between my first and second year of nursing school I began to lose focus, I began to "backslide" from God yet again, and I failed. Miserably. I felt like the whole world had just collapsed on me. Yet again, I lost sight of God, the most important thing in my life. This point in my life had became like many other times that I felt lost and hopeless. When I got things back on track with God and began diligently seeking his purpose, he gave me a vision. Some people believe in visions, some don't. All I know is that every time I would pray about God's purpose, I would see the same image....me..standing among other nurses in a medication room, holding hands in a circle and praying. From that moment on, I began to believe that God had indeed "called" me to be a nurse and was going to help me finish that last year of school. I had to take a year off, re-apply, and take some classes in the mean time but I knew without a doubt that God would help me get back in and finish. So you can imagine my thankfulness when in May 2013 I DID finish nursing school, took my national boards and became a Registered Nurse. I began to pray for God to place me where he needed/wanted me. Over the last 5-6 months I applied to numerous positions, got discouraged when I was never hired, starting to lose hope and I would see this "vision" again. A previous blog I wrote talks about God teaching me to trust him. This one talks about God being ever so patient with me, and God teaching me a lesson in patience. In September, I finally got a call for an interview. I thought the job hours, pay, and schedule would fit me and my children perfectly. I went for the interview and waited, and waited, and waited to hear something. I thought "ok, God, I'm being patient, but why haven't I heard anything?" And then I began to feel uneasy about the position, and began to ask God once again just to place me where he wanted me, not where I thought I should be, but where HE wanted me to be. Three weeks later I got the letter. I had not been accepted to fill the position. I was discouraged because I had never been "rejected" before and I felt sorry for myself. However, after praying about it, I felt peace. God knew I wouldn't be happy in that position, this position didn't even have a "medication room". lol. I also had peace because I knew that God had called me to be a direct help to people, to touch them, to be in direct contact with them and the position required more paperwork than actual patient care. I had Peace in knowing that God had called me for "his purpose" and that good things would come. I started proclaiming that I KNEW God was working out something in HIS time. Well let me just tell you how my God works. On a Saturday, I took a very sick child to a clinic. I had thrown on some clothes and just happened to be wearing a community college nursing school shirt. The nurse began to ask me questions about my career, where I was working, what my interests were, etc.She initiated the conversations, I didn't have to. God was opening a door for me. Before leaving, I felt the urge to ask the receptionist if they were hiring RNs. She said she thought they were and to call Human resources first thing Monday morning concerning the position. So I did. The HR manager told me that she thought the position at the clinic had been filled but that she had ALREADY given my application to the nursing manager for another department. I got a call from the nurse manager later that day and was asked to come in for an interview. I was very nervous yet I had peace about it. This blog kept coming to mind as well as the scripture above and I said "Lord, if you give me this position, I will give you all honor, glory, and praise. If this is where you want me Lord, I will go, just help me to understand where you want me and help me to care for others as you care for me". Would you believe that God just opened that door right up, held my hand and led me? I was the only one interviewed for the position, and I was offered the job before I even left the interview. You see, the reason the position was open in the first place is because they had a resignation. Wanna guess who from? The nurse who had resigned, had also applied for the position in which I was not accepted for a few weeks ago. Isn't it amazing how God works? I start my first job as an registered Nurse on November 11, 2013 on a medical/surgical unit in a hospital giving direct care to patients and I hope and pray that I can fulfill God's calling on my life as a care giver. I pray that I can be a daily witness to my patients, their families, and my co-workers. And one day soon, I believe whole heartedly that I WILL hold hands with other nurses, in a circle, in a medication room. Patience is not the only lesson that God has taught me during this time, he is also teaching me how to fully trust him!
Monday, November 4, 2013
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Peace for the Moment
KJV Matthew 6:34 - Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day [is] the evil thereof. *kingjamesbibleonline.org*
You know, worry is a tool that Satan uses against Christians to steal our joy and our peace. One of the hardest things for me to do is just to sit back and to be patient, regardless of how many times I remind myself "God is in control, he will deliver me, he will open doors for me", I find myself worrying. I believe this to be true that he will indeed open doors for me, but do I live this? If I constantly worry then I'm not living this...I am doubting.
It's really amazing how God speaks to us in that still small voice of his and reminds us of his love and his promises!
Sitting here this morning listening to a song that my dear friend and I recorded called "Why should I Worry" I began to think...why should I worry?!? God is in control of everything and I was led to the verse above, "take NO thought for the morrow". I began to think, why can I not be content in today? I struggle with this daily! I was thinking ahead to the end of the week and all the festivities that the kids have at school and then thinking back to my wallet and adding things up to see if there was enough to cover it and it hit me... "why am I still worrying?" I'm not supposed to worry about tomorrow, it has not happened yet. I am supposed to dwell on today and have peace in this moment. We are not promised another second, minute, hour, day, etc. If God wants me to stay at home right now, I should have peace here instead of worrying or wondering when he is going to open up an employment opportunity. Once again, if I say "God I trust you" then I need to live this. I don't need to tell a single person.. "well, God's not opened a door yet, but I think he's going to." I should proclaim "I am peaceful here because this is where God has placed me. I KNOW that he will open doors for me and my little family and I BELIEVE he's going to move in a mighty way." There may be something ahead in my journey that a job would complicate, I have no way of knowing this but I have to trust God that he is keeping me here for a reason.
You may struggle with this too, learning how NOT to doubt, learning to let God have his way, and learning to have peace for the moment! Proverbs 3:5-6 says "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. *6* In all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths." If I doubt... then I'm not trusting God, if I worry then I'm not acknowledging him in everything. so once again "Why should I worry, why should I fear, when this very same Jesus he is always near! He lives in MY heart and he hears when I cry, and I'll call on his name till the storm passes by." I don't know who wrote this song, but it speaks to me every time I hear it. It reminds me that the same Jesus that walked the earth long ago still walks with me daily, holding my hand and speaking so softly to me, directly to ME, HIS child! I can't let Satan steal my joy or my peace for the moment!
*~_Beverly_~*
You know, worry is a tool that Satan uses against Christians to steal our joy and our peace. One of the hardest things for me to do is just to sit back and to be patient, regardless of how many times I remind myself "God is in control, he will deliver me, he will open doors for me", I find myself worrying. I believe this to be true that he will indeed open doors for me, but do I live this? If I constantly worry then I'm not living this...I am doubting.
It's really amazing how God speaks to us in that still small voice of his and reminds us of his love and his promises!
Sitting here this morning listening to a song that my dear friend and I recorded called "Why should I Worry" I began to think...why should I worry?!? God is in control of everything and I was led to the verse above, "take NO thought for the morrow". I began to think, why can I not be content in today? I struggle with this daily! I was thinking ahead to the end of the week and all the festivities that the kids have at school and then thinking back to my wallet and adding things up to see if there was enough to cover it and it hit me... "why am I still worrying?" I'm not supposed to worry about tomorrow, it has not happened yet. I am supposed to dwell on today and have peace in this moment. We are not promised another second, minute, hour, day, etc. If God wants me to stay at home right now, I should have peace here instead of worrying or wondering when he is going to open up an employment opportunity. Once again, if I say "God I trust you" then I need to live this. I don't need to tell a single person.. "well, God's not opened a door yet, but I think he's going to." I should proclaim "I am peaceful here because this is where God has placed me. I KNOW that he will open doors for me and my little family and I BELIEVE he's going to move in a mighty way." There may be something ahead in my journey that a job would complicate, I have no way of knowing this but I have to trust God that he is keeping me here for a reason.
You may struggle with this too, learning how NOT to doubt, learning to let God have his way, and learning to have peace for the moment! Proverbs 3:5-6 says "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. *6* In all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths." If I doubt... then I'm not trusting God, if I worry then I'm not acknowledging him in everything. so once again "Why should I worry, why should I fear, when this very same Jesus he is always near! He lives in MY heart and he hears when I cry, and I'll call on his name till the storm passes by." I don't know who wrote this song, but it speaks to me every time I hear it. It reminds me that the same Jesus that walked the earth long ago still walks with me daily, holding my hand and speaking so softly to me, directly to ME, HIS child! I can't let Satan steal my joy or my peace for the moment!
*~_Beverly_~*
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
The Woods
Wednesday October 9, 2013
From the upstairs window I could see the sun shining brightly on the ridge top. I thought " I should walk up there, I bet it's beautiful." Instead, I busied myself with unfinished tasks left over from the day before. My tasks soon led me back to the upstairs window and as I looked out again I heard God say "Go, this moment will soon be gone." I got my camera and journal and started up the hill. Halfway up, I stopped to catch my breath and thought " I can't make it, I'm going to turn around, there's probably nothing up there anyway." I stood there a minute and looked back up the hill. The sun was illuminating everything dew covered leaf, every spiders' web and every limb. I asked God to give me the endurance to climb the hill. As I walked, I saw golden leaves raining down through the trees and could hear every bird's morning song. As I began to take pictures I looked up and caught the white tail of a deer leaping from my sight. I was disappointed! Not 30 seconds prior, I was looking in that very direction. I thought "GREAT, I've missed it!" I began to walk again up the hill looking in every direction for any sign of the deer. At one point the sun was shining so bright that I couldn't see in any direction, I thought of turning back and then I felt God speak again and say "Do you trust me?" I started taking one blind step after another while saying "Yes Lord, I trust you." As my walk led me to the top I stood for a few minutes soaking up the warm rays of sun. As I began to look for somewhere to sit, I started walking back down the hill, taking pictures as I went. I stopped, snapped a picture to the left, right, and in straight ahead, trying to capture the beauty of God's artwork. I glanced at some fallen leaves at my feet and when I looked down the path, there stood another deer, 5 yards away. A beautiful doe; ears up, tail up, alerted to danger. We stared at each other a few minutes, I carefully squatted down. After a minute or so the doe relaxed, down went the ears and she began to wag her tail. She no longer viewed me as a threat. As my foot began to tingle, I shifted. Once again her ears and tail were thrust into the air as she watched my every move. I captured her picture, which made her snort and stamp her foot. She was standing her ground. When i stood, she began to look left, then right, seeking an escape. As I took a step forward, she looked at me once more and in 3 swift leaps she was gone from my sight. I looked around in the woods and found the remnants of a tree stump which made the perfect "chair". I sat down and began to write, that's when God began to bring the words to the paper.
How often in life are we faced with Danger? We alert ourselves to the situation. Our senses are heightened. We hear every sound, our eyes see every thing, and we become afraid. We look left, right, forwards, and backwards for an escape. But too often we forget that if we stand still and let God intervene that he will relax us and take care of the situation. Like the deer, he will allow us to lower our ears, let down our guard and he will take care of the situation. How often though do we try to "run" from the trials, rather than seek God's will? We fail to let him tell us whether we need to "be still" or whether we need to "move." For the deer, stamping her foot was a warning to me not to get any closer. I was in "HER" woods, she wasn't in mine. Sometimes as Christians when the enemy rises against us we fail to take a stand, when we should stop and say "Enemy, you are in GOD'S WOODS."
Every trial, every burden, every heartache, every fear, we have to remember that God has a plan (Jeremiah 29:11 KJV "For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.") He doesn't give us battles without intending to give us the strength to fight them. But, we have to do our part too. We can't "run" if God says "be still", and we can't "be still" if God says "move." Often, we feel "blinded" by these trials and we think "I can't see which way to go, I have to turn back", but if we stop, look, and listen to God, we find him saying "trust me." It is then up to us to say "Yes Lord, I trust you, show me the path to take." This doesn't always mean that God is going to intervene immediately, it simply means that we trust what he is going to do. Whether he intends you move, or intends you to stand still, he simply wants you to have faith and trust him. (2 Corinthians 5:7 "For we walk by faith, not by sight.") Sometimes God sends the biggest blessings in the middle of the trials if we will "praise him in the storm."
I hope that these words encourage you in some way. I don't claim to be an author or even a writer, but God has placed it on my heart to begin this blog and to share the words that he has given me. My prayer is that God continues to give me the words if it is in his will and that he may use me to help others along the way. I only want to glorify his name. He has blessed me beyond measure and delivered me from the fiery trials of life so many times, the least I can do is take a stand for him! The title of this Blog "Deliverance From The Enemy" is a title that God placed in my heart a couple years ago at a time when I didn't understand the reason for a trial I was going through. It was as if God spoke to me and said "I'm going to use you, and I will deliver you from the enemy, just trust me!" It was during that time that I began to understand the security of God's love and the power in his promises. I fail him daily and could never repay him for sending his one and only Son Jesus Christ, who took my place on an old rugged cross, bore my sins and my shame, shed his blood, and died for you and me. I ask you friend, for you to pray that if it is in God's will for this blog to continue, that he give me the words that he wants me to share.
Love you and God Bless,
Beverly
From the upstairs window I could see the sun shining brightly on the ridge top. I thought " I should walk up there, I bet it's beautiful." Instead, I busied myself with unfinished tasks left over from the day before. My tasks soon led me back to the upstairs window and as I looked out again I heard God say "Go, this moment will soon be gone." I got my camera and journal and started up the hill. Halfway up, I stopped to catch my breath and thought " I can't make it, I'm going to turn around, there's probably nothing up there anyway." I stood there a minute and looked back up the hill. The sun was illuminating everything dew covered leaf, every spiders' web and every limb. I asked God to give me the endurance to climb the hill. As I walked, I saw golden leaves raining down through the trees and could hear every bird's morning song. As I began to take pictures I looked up and caught the white tail of a deer leaping from my sight. I was disappointed! Not 30 seconds prior, I was looking in that very direction. I thought "GREAT, I've missed it!" I began to walk again up the hill looking in every direction for any sign of the deer. At one point the sun was shining so bright that I couldn't see in any direction, I thought of turning back and then I felt God speak again and say "Do you trust me?" I started taking one blind step after another while saying "Yes Lord, I trust you." As my walk led me to the top I stood for a few minutes soaking up the warm rays of sun. As I began to look for somewhere to sit, I started walking back down the hill, taking pictures as I went. I stopped, snapped a picture to the left, right, and in straight ahead, trying to capture the beauty of God's artwork. I glanced at some fallen leaves at my feet and when I looked down the path, there stood another deer, 5 yards away. A beautiful doe; ears up, tail up, alerted to danger. We stared at each other a few minutes, I carefully squatted down. After a minute or so the doe relaxed, down went the ears and she began to wag her tail. She no longer viewed me as a threat. As my foot began to tingle, I shifted. Once again her ears and tail were thrust into the air as she watched my every move. I captured her picture, which made her snort and stamp her foot. She was standing her ground. When i stood, she began to look left, then right, seeking an escape. As I took a step forward, she looked at me once more and in 3 swift leaps she was gone from my sight. I looked around in the woods and found the remnants of a tree stump which made the perfect "chair". I sat down and began to write, that's when God began to bring the words to the paper.
How often in life are we faced with Danger? We alert ourselves to the situation. Our senses are heightened. We hear every sound, our eyes see every thing, and we become afraid. We look left, right, forwards, and backwards for an escape. But too often we forget that if we stand still and let God intervene that he will relax us and take care of the situation. Like the deer, he will allow us to lower our ears, let down our guard and he will take care of the situation. How often though do we try to "run" from the trials, rather than seek God's will? We fail to let him tell us whether we need to "be still" or whether we need to "move." For the deer, stamping her foot was a warning to me not to get any closer. I was in "HER" woods, she wasn't in mine. Sometimes as Christians when the enemy rises against us we fail to take a stand, when we should stop and say "Enemy, you are in GOD'S WOODS."
Every trial, every burden, every heartache, every fear, we have to remember that God has a plan (Jeremiah 29:11 KJV "For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.") He doesn't give us battles without intending to give us the strength to fight them. But, we have to do our part too. We can't "run" if God says "be still", and we can't "be still" if God says "move." Often, we feel "blinded" by these trials and we think "I can't see which way to go, I have to turn back", but if we stop, look, and listen to God, we find him saying "trust me." It is then up to us to say "Yes Lord, I trust you, show me the path to take." This doesn't always mean that God is going to intervene immediately, it simply means that we trust what he is going to do. Whether he intends you move, or intends you to stand still, he simply wants you to have faith and trust him. (2 Corinthians 5:7 "For we walk by faith, not by sight.") Sometimes God sends the biggest blessings in the middle of the trials if we will "praise him in the storm."
I hope that these words encourage you in some way. I don't claim to be an author or even a writer, but God has placed it on my heart to begin this blog and to share the words that he has given me. My prayer is that God continues to give me the words if it is in his will and that he may use me to help others along the way. I only want to glorify his name. He has blessed me beyond measure and delivered me from the fiery trials of life so many times, the least I can do is take a stand for him! The title of this Blog "Deliverance From The Enemy" is a title that God placed in my heart a couple years ago at a time when I didn't understand the reason for a trial I was going through. It was as if God spoke to me and said "I'm going to use you, and I will deliver you from the enemy, just trust me!" It was during that time that I began to understand the security of God's love and the power in his promises. I fail him daily and could never repay him for sending his one and only Son Jesus Christ, who took my place on an old rugged cross, bore my sins and my shame, shed his blood, and died for you and me. I ask you friend, for you to pray that if it is in God's will for this blog to continue, that he give me the words that he wants me to share.
Love you and God Bless,
Beverly
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)